I have this really terrible ability to crush people with a few terse sentences or even a simple stare.
It's not calculated. It's almost always spontaneous and utterly reflexive -- the result of being so furious at someone on who I've got a good enough read to instinctively nail in just the right way, at just the right time.
Earlier this week, I did that to someone at work. And now, I'm sorry for it. That was not fair of me. It sent this person over the edge, like I guess I knew it would.
And now, this person is gone. Checked out. Incommunicado. But not before leaving a lot of weird emotional vitriol about me in his/her wake.
The funny thing is, I've been this person's biggest supporter for the past 8 months. I've patiently helped this person when things were confusing to him/her. I've been this person's biggest (and only) supporter in my business unit. I've flat out done some of this person's work for him/her. And I've declined to skewer this person in a public meeting with senior management, even though my direct boss more or less encouraged it.
It's not calculated. It's almost always spontaneous and utterly reflexive -- the result of being so furious at someone on who I've got a good enough read to instinctively nail in just the right way, at just the right time.
Earlier this week, I did that to someone at work. And now, I'm sorry for it. That was not fair of me. It sent this person over the edge, like I guess I knew it would.
And now, this person is gone. Checked out. Incommunicado. But not before leaving a lot of weird emotional vitriol about me in his/her wake.
The funny thing is, I've been this person's biggest supporter for the past 8 months. I've patiently helped this person when things were confusing to him/her. I've been this person's biggest (and only) supporter in my business unit. I've flat out done some of this person's work for him/her. And I've declined to skewer this person in a public meeting with senior management, even though my direct boss more or less encouraged it.
posted by isaacjosephson at 1:41 PM
1 Comments:
You do indeed have a knack for working folks up. As mad as I ever got at HAT or Jerry, I think the maddest I ever got at Tunes was at you. I don't remember what it was over, but I remember LITERALLY trembling with rage, fighting my basest instincts.
Sounds like a tough situation, this particular one. Prolly ought to initiate the acts of forgiveness -- forgive yourself, this person, your boss, etc. Get that out of the way, then initiate conciliation. You're a good and loving soul at your core, despite what you may sometimes project, so you'll likely be tormented by this until you start all the healing crap.
And btw, as much as you can be infuriating, you're also a hell of a lot of fun to work with a lot of the time. You're smart AND clever (a rare combination), not to mention capable and full of pride (in a good way).
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